Have You Seen My Serenity?

I’ve lost it. Last year, while in France, I carefully cultivated an even temper. Bad things happened, good things happened, but I stayed calm the entire time.

But now, I’m having trouble adapting. I’m swinging from extreme highs to extreme lows.

This weekend, Raul and I spent four fantastic days in a few Moorish cities. Raul wanted to show them to me because he wanted to share more of his life and his loves. I, however, by the end of the weekend had a wicked crying fit. Two of Raul’s friends joined us and as much as I enjoy being with people, it drives me nuts that I can’t contribute, and not just because of the language barrier. I don’t get cultural references either.

And I hate not knowing things.

Fortunately I didn’t let my bad mood get in the way of enjoying the weekend.

No Lessons today. I’m on sinus medication and it’s making me dizzier than I usually am.

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4 thoughts on “Have You Seen My Serenity?

  1. It is very frustrating when you can’t express yourself and you have no concept of the cultural references. This happens to me all the time due to where I live and the language I speak. But trust me, the people who are worth knowing, will get to know you even if you aren’t familiar with Spanish pop culture.

  2. Nada Thomson says:

    Just because you didn’t experience highs and lows in France, doesn’t mean that your insides didn’t register them, but you were on a different mission and therefore had no time to acknowledge it…so, now that you are with a true friend (Raul) and your mission involves learning (taking stuff in, inhaling information) instead of writing (both taking stuff in AND letting stuff go, exhaling information) your insides have stuff to get rid of! Don’t fight it,Alex! You’re healthy! Your genius inside is doing exactly what it needs to do to not only survive but thrive:) Keep up the good work! Oh, and I believe your cold is another coping mechanism adopted by your insides…but I won’t bore you with that;)

  3. Alex Fayle says:

    Jacki: I´m the only one who judges me for not knowing Spanish pop culture.

    Nada: Funny how you mention that, for as soon as I wrote my piece about Discovering Patience I felt immediately better. And now I have only the smallest traces of a stuffy nose.

  4. Nada Thomson says:

    Yay! I’m so glad you’re feeling better:) And I’ll say prayers for you as you embark on this new venture of job hunting…

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