Trapped in the Day-to-Day: Urban Panther Interview Part 1

While the Urban Panther might be new to the blogosphere, she’s been in my life for a very long time (being my sister). We often help each other when we get stuck and recently it was my turn to help her get unstuck. The Panther was the first person to run through my email workshop (premiering today) and through that discovered her passion for blogging.

Who: Elizabeth Fayle of the Urban Panther’s Lair
Elizabeth (aka the Urban Panther) is phasing out her existence as an IT Project Manager in Ontario, and phasing in her existence as a humourist blogger in Quebec.

What variety of Someday Syndrome affected you the most? In what way?
I’ll Get Around To It Someday. I have been writing all my life. Just ask Alex about finding the My Life With Elton John story when I was twelve. (I still haven’t forgiven him, and my other brother, Rob, for snooping!) [Note from Alex: It was a really good story – very creative!] For the past several years I have been writing for family and friends, but I never really did anything with my writing, despite the encouragement I got from many people to actually get paid for writing. Ya, ya, someday. Sure friends and family are interested, but the rest of the world?

How did it affect the rest of your life?
I was unfulfilled. I work in IT and I am so not technical. Worse yet, I’m a project manager, so I spend a lot of time crunching numbers. BORING! I was just writing one story every two or three weeks, and this wasn’t enough to create a balance between the creative and the mundane.

How would you describe your happiness level at that time?
Oh, bad, bad, bad. With one caveat. I met a fantastic man, so my personal life was, and still is, incredible. But my attitude towards work was deteriorating exponentially. It got to the point I was physically sick each morning, thinking about dragging myself into work.

Did the other varieties of Someday Syndrome appear in your life as well?
I Might Need It Someday. Not so much directly anymore, because when I left my previous relationship I took my brother’s brilliant advice..that would be Alex, not Sibling Rob..and asked myself two questions: Really need it? Really love it? If I couldn’t answer yes to either of those, out it went. However, I have recently moved in with my fantastic man, and woo-ey do I have a challenge ahead of me, helping him through those two questions.

And to an even lesser degree Someday My Ship Will Come In. I used to sit around and wait for the world to come to me, but I am getting better at figuring out what I want from my life, going after that, and asking for help along the way.

Someday Lessons:

  • It’s very easy to let day-to-day living grind you down into unfulfilled powder.
  • You likely already know what your passions are, but are just ignoring or surpressing them.

Read the rest of the interview tomorrow…

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21 thoughts on “Trapped in the Day-to-Day: Urban Panther Interview Part 1

  1. Urbane Lion says:

    Mine, mine, mine! She’s all mine! Oh yeah! I’m one lucky Dude!

  2. Karen Swim says:

    Alex, thanks for sharing your wonderful sister with us. Elizabeth, I relate to so much of your story thus far. I particularly liked what you said about “Someday my ship will come in.” In these mid years I have been grasping that lesson too. I am very much looking forward to the next part of this interview. Congratulations on owning your someday and making it this day!

    Karen Swim’s last blog post..Your Choices Determine Your Results

  3. Good luck with that helping Lion thing, Panther. It ain’t gonna be easy.

    That’s a good trick you have, by the way. “Really need it? Really love it?” I’d actually replace “really” with “realistically” for question one – it’s amazing what we realistically *don’t* need but think we do, and we hang onto that desperately.

    Realistically need it? Really love this? Yup. That works for me.

  4. @Lion – lucky man indeed, but then again, I am one lucky woman!

    @Karen – thank you. I think it helps that I am at a point in my life that I am not having to look after other people’s (children, dysfunctional previous partner) and I can finally concentrate on what I want from life.

    @James – you don’t know the half of it. Wait until you read the Lion’s response to this week’s lab rat assignment. He actually accused me of priming Alex with this week’s questions! And I like your ‘realistically need it’. I have been moving out of the apartment, which means we are combining posessions, so I need to go through things again. This time I will ask “Do I realistically need this?”

    Urban Panther’s last blog post..To poo or not to poo, that is the question.

  5. steph says:

    I related to a lot of this! I think I’m a bit behind in finding out what I really want, though. I mean, I have a general idea, but I admit I also have this THING going on that won’t really allow me to dream or decide what I want. I think it’s something like not wanting to get my hopes up, combined with fear of deciding, when maybe it’s not really want I truly want. Also, not daring to believe that what I want I can have…you know, just in case. Not believing or not setting myself up for disappointment.

    Which is sad, I know. I have a hard time believing my dreams will come true. And I guess they won’t if I believe that and if I don’t actively do anything toward them.

    As for getting rid of stuff, I’m queen at it. I’m the total opposite of a pack rat. Which is weird, in a way, though it might also make sense, considering there’s actually a ton of emotional baggage I hang on to. Maybe I feel that clutter so much, I empty myself of material things. I weed out everything and often.

    Now to apply that to all the shit I hold to that’s keeping me from moving forward!

    steph’s last blog post..Making a List and Checking it Twice

  6. @Steph – someone said this to me once “The more chaotic your internal world is, the more you strive to keep you external world organized. It brings a sense of control.” So, based on this, your description of your internal state versus your weeding of material things isn’t that odd.

    If Alex posts this Friday what he told me he is going to, it relates to the first part of your comment.

    @Alex – there you go. You have to write Friday’s post now. *grin*

    Urban Panther’s last blog post..To poo or not to poo, that is the question.

  7. writerchick says:

    I love your sister – actually she introduced us, didn’t she? Fantastic woman, hysterically funny and lots of panache.

    Panther, I know that feeling sick rush at the prospect of going to the job. Horrible isn’t it? No one should have to feel that way. I for one, couldn’t be happier that you decided blogging/writing was for you.


  8. Cath Lawson says:

    What a great interview. I hope Urban Panther is able to focus more time on her writing, instead of waiting for her ship to come in.

    And I’m going to be remembering those to questions from now on – really need it? really love it? Thanks.

  9. Natural says:

    Hey there Alex, I enjoyed this interview. Panther would be great as a humorist blogger, she tickles me with her writing, I love it. I too feel like her, going to a job that I really don’t like…and waiting for my ship to come in…I know I’m going to have to swim out there to my ship. I am making plans to do this. Will be back for tomorrow’s interview.

  10. Marelisa says:

    What a great interview! IT project manager, I wouldn’t have pictured Urban Panther in that job. Humorist blogger, that sounds more like it 🙂

    Marelisa’s last blog post..How to Make Decisions

  11. @Marelisa – ya, I can’t picture me as an IT project manager either *smile*

    Urban Panther’s last blog post..To poo or not to poo, that is the question.

  12. Amy Derby says:

    I’m simply happy to learn the Panther’s name so I can stop calling her Panther. 🙂

    Amy Derby’s last blog post..Why Would Anybody Want To Be A Freelancer Today?

  13. I am so excited to learn the Panther’s name. i feel like I’ve been given access to top secret information or something. Great first part of the interview. I just can’t see “Elizabeth” (giggles) working in I.T. Such a waste of a great writing talent.

    Can’t wait for tomorrow.

  14. Evelyn Lim says:

    It’s so nice to know a family of bloggers, each maintaining their own and supporting each other. Great interview! I’ve been reading Panther’s blog so this is nice!

    Evelyn Lim’s last blog post..An Enchanting Vision From My Angels

  15. Hi Alex and Elizabeth (Panther),

    What a great start to an interview. I’m so used to Panther being so full of spunk, it’s hard to imagine her in a position of hating to go to work.

    I’ll be back for part 2.

    Barbara Swafford’s last blog post..NBOTW – Putting His Spin On It

  16. Alex Fayle says:

    Yes, you are a very lucky Lion, and don’t you forget it! (says the protective younger brother).

    I think a lot of people’s mid-life crises comes from suddenly realizing that we’ve been waiting for our ship to come in instead of chartering a boat ourselves.

    Realistically is a good word as well. It’s takes out some of the emotion and makes the decision more practical.

    We would never conspire against the Lion, right? Right? 😉

    Yesterday I was so where you were. I was in a foul evil mood full of self-doubt and fear (having just launched my workshop). It wasn’t because I don’t think the workshop rocks (I wouldn’t have released it if I didn’t think it was the best tool I could have produced). No, my self-doubt and fear were more around marketing and sales – had I done enough? Was the blog sticky enough? And then within a few hours I had a sale and bam! away went the self-doubt and fear.

    Great quote – and it’s very true (although I tend to get more chaotic physically when I get chaotic internally).

    Yes, she did introduce us and I’m very glad she did. I too used to feel that sick feeling in my stomach going to work, which is one of the reasons I became a Professional Organizer working for myself.

    I love that the UP can write more – she’s very talented and the world needs to see that!

    Yay to plans to swimming out to the ship on your own. Following the Lab-Rats (on Weds and Thurs) might help (as would the workshop, of course 😉 )

    I know, eh? I’ve never seen the UP in an office job and so I can’t get the visual. It just doesn’t suit, although I can picture her Tigger-bouncing her way down hallways when things do go well.

    Unh-unh-unh – It’s all about branding – she’s the Panther and don’t none of us forget it! 😉

    I think Urban Panther suits her much better than Elizabeth sometimes – perhaps she should legally change her name. What do you think?

    Thanks for visiting! And yes, it’s wonderful having the blogging support from the Panther – it’s made blogging much more enjoyable for me too.

    Seeing the Panther full of life and spunk is so exciting for me. I’m so happy she’s found her passion.

  17. Alex Fayle says:

    BTW folks, just because I’m a bratty younger brother, I’m going to share with you something of the My Life with Elton John story (or at least what I remember – I was six and thought is was AWESOME!)

    It was a bunch of short stories anecdoting what was happening in Elton’s life with the Urban Panther being one of his entourage.

    I remember explanations for lines, like how “oh my gawd, what’s that” from The Bitch is Back came from Elton seeing a rotten orange sitting on the kitchen table.

    And then there was the time someone banged Elton while he was singing and because he always sang so close to the microphone it popped down his throat and when they pulled it out, his guts came with it.

    So yeah, the Urban Panther has always been a VERY FUNNY writer of vignettes. I’m glad that she finally has a great audience to perform to…

  18. Karen Putz says:

    What a sister you have, Alex! I want to see more of her writing and I’m looking forward to part two.

  19. @Everyone – in the blogging world, I am the Urban Panther. If we ever have the pleasure to meet in person, I am Elizabeth. (Dang it all, Alex, it WAS a deep dark secret) *smile*

    Urban Panther’s last blog post..Full blown change meltdown

  20. Hi Alex and Panther,

    Thank you for this really cool and inspiring interview. You really both are remarkable people. I also love your pic Elizabeth. But I’m not sure, what do you prefer to be called?

    Do you rather stay the UP or go with your name? Looking forward for part 2.

    Monika Mundell’s last blog post..The World Is Still Turning!

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