Up until now, the Someday Interview series has featured bloggers, people who’ve for the most part overcome their Somedays and now do exactly what they want with their lives (with a few minor adjustments needed).
This week, the interview focuses on someone who’s still struggling with their Somedays, who feels that the life they want remains out of reach. Who is that someone?
Looking in the mirror, what do you see? You likely see several people living in one body: a paradoxical mix of someone who takes on too much and yet never gets anything done (or even started). You have a strong interest in personal development, but find yourself living on autopilot.
Name one moment in your life when you threw a pity party for yourself and the reasons why you felt you weren’t able to achieve your goals. Were you feeling stuck? Had you felt you failed? What wasn’t working in your life?
Hmmm… which low moment should you choose? They are a few you could pick, eh? How about that one where you found yourself working too much on something that didn’t thrill you, where you felt disconnected from the people around you and you wandered around experiencing various levels of discontent, from general melancholy to lashing-out anger?
The choices you had made up to that point hadn’t led where you thought you’d go. Or you had let others make decisions for you and now you were living the consequences of those decisions. The people around you didn’t offer you the support you needed and the well-meaning offers of assistance showed just how little people understood your situation.
Even our lowest moments fulfill a need in us or express our desires. When you threw yourself that pity party, what did you hope to gain? What need did you fulfill?
Your real dreams, your innermost desires were pushing you to feel the pain of your non-dream-pursuing situation in hopes of pushing you to a point of no return where you’d actually recognize what your dreams were and to take action to fulfill them.
Tell us what you did to break up the pity part. What actions did you decide to take? Did someone help you buoy your spirits? Push you along?
If you were lucky you had someone carefully but firmly pull you out of your wallowing. If not, you hit a point where your dreams gave up waiting and kicked you in the butt. You started reading and talking about personal development, in books, on blogs, everywhere. You’ve discovered a great community of people online and you connect with them, many times by just reading about their adventures, but sometimes jumping in and joining the conversation.
Since that moment, you’ve spent a lot of time figuring out your life and while you’ve made progress, you’re frustrated by how slow it’s going. Who knew self-guided self-awareness would take so long?
Can you look back on that moment and tell us how you felt when you did decide to take action? What results came about from your decision to take charge and move on?
The energy that came from making a decision to change was like chugging back ten espressos. You were hyper-excited and ready to rock. You scribbled notes to yourself, made plans, subscribed to blogs and newsletters.
And then got stuck. The inertia of your previous stuckedness kept you from moving forward quickly and without immediate results your excitement waned, and now you feel worse than before. You know you don’t want the life you have, but you’re not sure quite what your dreams are or how to get them started.
Everyone has a Someday problem hiding deep inside, even little ones. What variety of the Someday Syndrome do you currently harbor? What would you like to achieve but haven’t yet?
If you’re like most people, you suffer from a mix of Someday My Ship Will Come In and I’ll Get Around To It Someday. And again like most people, when you really think about how much stuff you own, you also suffer from I Might Need It Syndrome.
As much as you’d like to have a different life you still aren’t sure quite what it is, or even if you do, you have no idea how to get started and stay on track until the finish
Examining your Someday Syndrome problem, what are you currently doing to resolve it and eliminate it from your life?
So far, you’ve continued doing what you did when you first got excited hoping to catch that feeling of the thrill again. You’ve realized, however, that if you are going to actually make progress, you’re going to have to change what you’re doing.
Unfortunately you’re not sure what that is.
Many people suffer the same problems you do. You’re not alone, and neither are they. What would you tell people in your situation right now to help them avoid what you’re going through?
Ask for help. We don’t all know how to do everything perfectly. Most people will pay for an electrician to wire their home, but then expect themselves to be able to wire their life and not get electrified in the process.
If you could ask for one thing, right now, to help you overcome your Someday Syndrome, what type of help would you ask for?
You’d ask for someone who understands fear, procrastination and the desire to find happiness. Someone who makes you accountable and uses questions and metaphors to help you think about your situation in a different way. Someone who would take the Somedays out of your life.
Fortunately that someone now exists – announcing the Someday-Busting Coaching services – help at multiple levels tailored to fit your needs and your budget.
So stop doing the same thing over and over and not get the results you want. Check out the Someday-Busting Coaching
And if you reserve your place in a Gold or Silver program before the end of March, you will receive two free Skype instant messenger sessions on top of your regular coaching program.