I love doing interviews with young people. Bud is just finishing high school and yet he has a better grasp on the whole Someday-Busting thing than many people twice his age. Of course, I felt the same way back at age 17, but I let fear block me from actually following through on any of my dreams. Reading Bud’s interview I doubt that Bud will allow himself to get blocked in the same way.
Who: Bud Hennekes of A Boundless World
Bud is a person who’s passionate about living life to the fullest, awakening people to their true potential along the way.
Name one moment in your life when you threw a pity party for yourself and the reasons why you felt you weren’t able to achieve your goals. Were you feeling stuck? Had you felt you failed? What wasn’t working in your life?
I stopped throwing myself pity parties long ago. When I was a freshman and sophomore in high school I ran cross country for my high school team. I was the king of pity parties.
Whenever I had a bad race I would always throw myself a pity party hoping that those around would feel sorry for me. I threw pity parties but no one came.
It took a while, but I eventually realized that pity parties did more harm than good. You see when you throw pity parties for yourself, you reinforce the negative thoughts that made you feel down in the first place. Never wallow in your own mistakes, rather accept them and move on.
Too often we put way to much pressure on ourselves consequently remain miserable. There’s no rule in life saying we can’t fail. There’s no rule in life saying we can’t come up short.
When you make a mistake accept that you made a mistake. When you feel bad accept that you feel bad. Don’t continually wallow in your own shortcomings, instead embrace each and every moment you have.
Even our lowest moments fulfill a need in us or express our desires. When you threw yourself that pity party, what did you hope to gain? What need did you fulfill?
When we throw pity parties for ourselves we are often under the illusion that this will make everything better. But in reality all pity parties do is prolong the recovery time it takes to return to our optimal state.
Pity parties accomplish nothing. It’s OK to feel bad. It’s OK to feel down.
It’s not OK to continually wallow in our own shortcomings for then we allow the negative emotions to dictate our life.
Feel your emotions and let them go.
When I regularly threw pity parties for myself I hoped that someone would come along and make me feel better. The truth is the only one who can truly make you feel better is yourself. Yes friends and family can lend you support ( I don’t know where I’d be without it.) but you are in control.
You don’t need to throw a pity party to feel better. All you need is redirect your thoughts. 🙂
Tell us what you did to break up the pity party. What actions did you decide to take? Did someone help you buoy your spirits? Push you along?
Whenever I am feeling down I try to accept my feeling rather than resist them. The more you resist your emotions the stronger they become.
We will all have moments in our life when we aren’t at our best but we must learn to be able to redirect our negative thoughts into a more positive manner.
The worst thing we can do is allow your negative emotions to become a part of you. When your feeling down it is essential that you seek encouragement from your friends and family. They want to help you.
I also spend a great amount of time searching for some motivational material. When your motivated you’d be surprised at how quickly your party ends.
Can you look back on that moment and tell us how you felt when you did decide to take action? What results came about from your decision to take charge and move on?
Whenever I fee like I’m about to throw a pity party for myself I close my eyes and take several deep breathes. I ask “why am I feeling like this?” This allows me to regain some control of my emotions.
Often times we act on impulse which prolongs the time we are feeling down.
When your feeling sad or depressed slow down. Take a moment to just be. Close your eyes and take several deep breathes. Simply doing so will have a tremendous effect on your mood.
One of my favorite things to do when I’m having a bad day, is to take out a piece of paper and write down all the things I”m grateful for. I learned this method from money of the most successful individuals today.
I remember specifically one day I took out the piece of paper and I couldn’t think of ANYTHING I was grateful for, so I wrote down “I’m thankful for being able to breathe.”
This really hit me as just the gift of breathing is something to be thankful for.
Sure life is often far from perfect but when you really think about it, it’s great to be alive.
Everyone has a Someday problem hiding deep inside, even little ones. What variety of the Someday Syndrome do you currently harbor? What would you like to achieve but haven’t yet?
One of my major flaws is that I continually put off happiness. “When this is done I’ll be happy” I often say yet in reality I’m simply succumbing to the happiness illusion.
The key to being happy is to be experience the moment now. I have improved in this area tremendously over the years but I still have a ways to go. As I continue to put effort into living in the moment I have found myself to be much more happier. Happiness isn’t experienced tomorrow but rather right now.
Examining your Someday Syndrome problem, what are you currently doing to resolve it and eliminate it from your life?
Right now I’m making it my highest priority to do the things I love. All too often people fill their lives with people and things they can’t stand, then they wonder why they are miserable.
It is my belief that life is meant to be enjoyed. When I fill my days with things I love, living becomes effortless. When I choose to fill my day with things I dread life becomes a chore.
Obviously there will be things you don’t necessarily enjoy, yet it is important to make a conscious effort to keep those things to a minimum.
Many people suffer the same problems you do. You’re not alone, and neither are they. What would you tell people in your situation right now to help them avoid what you’re going through?
One of the greatest problems of today’s world is we all think we are alone. The reality is that we are all connected. I am aware that may come off as a bit new age but that is a belief I have been happy to adopt.
Too often we think that our problems are unique when in fact people have been through the exact situation you have.
When we realize that our problems are not unique it becomes easier to deal with them. If you are in a place in your life where you don’t want to be, there are people out there who want to help you. Realize that you are not alone.
Be grateful. Be happy. Time heals all pain.
If you could ask for one thing, right now, to help you overcome your Someday Syndrome, what type of help would you ask for?
I would just like to know that all the effort I’m putting in to making this world a better place will pay off. Too be honest I know without a doubt that it will, but there’s always that part in the back of your mind saying ” What if?”
While there is a chance it won’t I don’t have the time or energy to waste on playing the what if game. As long as I continue to put forth my best effort in helping humanity for the better my vision will manifest. Sure I may not know the exact path but I will reach my goals.